Help Me if You Can I'm Feelin Down

Dad cried when listening to the Beattles song the other day. "Help me get my feet back on the ground. Won't you please, please help me." I can't believe what my poor Daddy has gone through. I wish I could do it for him. I guess that's what Jesus did for us. He carried the pain of our world, the suffering, and the consequence of our sin. I think God can relate to how we feel...he sees, hears, and feels our pain.

Today, the name of the game is neck pain and fluid reduction. Milan's back and neck must be a chiropractor's nightmare. Spreading ribs open is bound to create some displacement. He complains more of neck pain than incision discomfort. Also, please pray for a regular heart beat and consistent blood pressure. Sleep seems to help, but he is so sleep deprived that he keeps falling right into REM sleep, where dreaming occurs. Suddenly, people appear in his room or he finds himself in places that feel as vivid as real life. I'm praying he'll fall asleep and find himself with God or flying or something fun:) He just told me he was in church in his last doze, so that's a start.

Also, his fluid retention is subsiding, but still an issue. They need to rehydrate his body, while removing fluid from his lungs, heart, and places it shouldn't be. I'll tell you one thing: we take our bodies healthy function for granted. After seeing all the delicate balances that must be regulated, I'm amazed we're all walking and living day to day without more problems. Sometimes I wonder if we'll ever get out of here. I'm overwhelmed by all the things that must fall into place before Dad can come home. I just have to remember God is so much bigger than this. I remember hiking Half Dome, feeling amazed by how God merely spoke our world into place. He holds Daddy in his almighty arms, controlling every breath and pulse with knowing hands.

I Love My Daddy!

Back In ICU at the New Building

Milan made it through the surgery okay. Turns out, this was a life saving procedure. Doctors said Milan wouldn't have made it if he wasn't as strong as he was. Thank God he's a Kung Fu Master! I must say I lost it when I heard what a close call this was. They made a minimal incision near his lower sternum and were able to drain the fluid without having to open his ribs again. They also drained some fluid from his right lung while they were in there. BIG PRAYER REQUEST: Pray fluid does not continue to build up around his heart. There is no guarantee this can't happen again! At the moment, he still has chest tubes draining any excess, but they can't leave the chest tubes in too long since it runs the risk of infection. Pray for the appropriate timing to remove the chest tubes.

Dad is in the new Ronald Regan Medical Center. They moved every patient from the old building to the new facility today. It's so nice to be in a brand new hospital that smells nice, has clean floors, new technology, a more comfortable rooms. Pray for Dad's heart to be encouraged and for his recovery to be more noticeable every day.

We're all exhausted, especially mom. I was amazed at her strength last night. She and my brother Kevin pushed for more tests and doctors to determine the problem. They saved his life. When the right doctor finally made it to our room, he determined the problem by looking at my dad for a matter of minutes. He noticed his swollen stomach, lack of pulse with inhalation, difficulty breathing, cold extremities, and extreme exhaustion, and then fit the pieces together for appropriate treatment. He's an angel. He then set things in motion, demanding quick treatment. He knew the severity of the situation. He came in at 5:00. Dad was in surgery by 6:30. God hands covered Dad last night. So did your prayers. Keep them coming. We need them more than ever.

- Daddy's girl

Prayers needed now...

Milan was sent back to the Operating Room tonight after an evaluation by an internist. We think that his significant setback is due to fluid between his heart and pericardium (the sac surrounding the heart). This is causing Milan's heart to work harder than it should. We think that after this procedure, he should improve quickly. Please pray for his kidney and liver throughout this process as they are currently impaired.

It's going to be a late night so we will have an update in the morning.

Thank you so much for the continued prayers everyone.

A Few Steps Back

Recovery is slowing and taking a few steps back. We're praying for answers, so appropriate help can be underway. This morning Dad couldn't go to the bathroom, he could barely walk, he felt short of breath, and the scale says he gained 20 pounds, which seems impossible after hardly eating hospital food. I'm wondering if he has fluid build up somewhere, which would account for the weight gain, weakness, and trouble breathing normally. Mom is tired and done. Really, they both just feel burried by days of the same story again and again. We need every prayer we can get at this point. Pray for answers, helpful treatment, encouragement, and for my daddy to get better. God is Good.

When Can I Come Home?

Milan's physical progress is still moving along, but this morning he hit an emotional wall. He wants to come home and he's feeling stur crazy in his hospital room. Mornings are typically difficult for him--he doesn't sleep well, the medicines give him vivid and sometimes troublesome dreams, and he wakes up tired and discouraged. I'm on my way up with a goodie basket to cheer him up:) I printed all the comments from the blog so he can read your supportive notes for himself. We're praying doctors can give him an estimate of when he can come home so he has something to looks forward to.

A Fresh Shave and Clean Hair

It's amazing how much clean hair and a fresh shave makes a world of difference after a week without it. I visited Dad yesterday, and then rushed off to work. (Sorry I didn't get a chance to update you). He went for a walk, ate lunch, sat up for a massage, and laughed harder than I've heard in quite some time. For the first time, I really saw a glimpse of my Daddy since his surgery last week.

After I left, they drained the fluid from his lungs. Immediately, he felt relieved and able to breath more freely. I think such quick, positive results helped his spirits too.

Also, the doctors feel it is too early to put in a pace maker. As of now, they regulate his heart beat and blood pressure with medicine. In a way, this answered my prayer. I asked God for a delay or uncertainty if Dad could pull through at some point and regulate these vitals on his own. The Lord will guide us.

Permanent Pace Maker?

Today we need wisdom. Doctors are considering placing a permanent pace maker in Milan's chest. (It goes under the skin, it wouldn't be an invasive procedure like the valve repair.) The doctors say his lower heart rate is a reponse to them reducing the size of his atrium.

Pray the doctors can use discernment and wisdom to make this decision. If Dad can pull through and bounce back without it at some point, that would be ideal. If not, perhaps the pace maker is the best solution.

Hearts are so complex...can you believe God created them? I know God can put Dad's back together.

Sleep Deprived

Poor Dad is having a hard time today. He's hardly slept in the past four days and he is starting to show signs of sleep deprivation. He's battling incoherency and doctors are trying to get him comfortable enough so he can rest. Sleep is the biggest prayer request right now!

Dad is also having a hard time breathing due to some fluid in his lungs. He needs to do breathing exercises to expand his lung capacity as well. These exercises will help him breath better and reduce the fluid.

We're all tired, especially Dad. Pray for rest.

Pace Maker

Updates first. Dad's making progress in some areas and still needs a little help in others. Today he was eating, sleeping, and using the restroom. It's good to get body function up and running! Dad's heart rate and blood pressure is still a little lower than they want. He had a heart rate in the 50s and they wanted it in the 70s. They hooked up his pace maker for partial use, only on one section of his heart. He responded well and it kept his beat at an even 77. If they end up needing to use the pace maker on all sections of his heart, they will send him back to ICU. Pray his body can transition to independent function without assistance.

Now the good stuff. My sister Amy and I visited Dad today. We sported "Team Milan" shirts that read "I love Dad" on the back. Mom's said, "I love my cute husband" instead. Dad said we could of been called "Team Blonde" too.

For the record, we call Amy "sister", so that's what she'll be referred to from now on.

So sister brought a luxurious goody bag for Dad--a nice down pillow that puts those plastic hospital puffs to shame, a cool fan for his room, a heated lavender pillow for neck relief, and massage oils to loosen his tense muscles. We sat him up, turned his new Father's Day iPod on a worship playlist, snuggled the warm lavender pillow around his neck, and massaged oil into his back, neck, hands, and feet. His poor feet and hands are so swollen. (He reminded me to massage towards his heart:) Thank you Dr. Milan! All the nurses wanted a turn too! We got a few smiles on his face and a rendition of "How Great Thou Art" with his roommate.

Prayer Requests:
- A healthy transition off the pace maker. Dad need to sustain a good heart rate and blood pressure on his own.
- Restful sleep to help recover.
- A place to stay for Mom! She is staying at the Triverton house at UCLA, but her reservation is up after tonight. Unless someone makes a cancellation, she'll have to move hotels or go home.

No News is Good News

Our patient Milan is doing well. All is about the same with the exception of some more shut eye. He could barely sleep because of the pain (I wonder why?!) The nurses didn't want to give him too much pain medication because it makes his blood pressure drop too much--kind of a miserable cycle. Rest and recovery remain the name of the game.

Thank you all so much for your support and prayers. I keep telling Dad about all of your sweet comments.

ICU is the Bomb Digity!

I must say, the Intensive Care Unit at the UCLA Medical Center is the Rolls Royce of hospital care. A private nurse monitors Milan's recovery 24 hours a day, tending to his every need with expertise and care.

When I saw my Dad for the first time, I was impressed by his pink color. Besides the tubes and cords everywhere, he looks incredible for being just 24 hours out of surgery. In fact, I've grown a fond comfort for all these machines and monitors. As much as Milan complains about the discomfort they cause, they also provide safety, consistency, and the ability to monitor his progress closely.

In between periods of rest, the nurse challenges Milan to sit in a chair, expand his lung capacity with breathing exercises, and drink and eat. I'm often surprised by how pushing his comfort level speeds recovery. They hope to have him walking by tomorrow. He is a great patient, even when in pain. He complains of muscle soreness from lying still of a stiff operating table for 8 hours. Mom and I have been massaging his neck, back, hands, and feet to relieve his tightness.

Praise God for all so far and continue to pray for recovery, rest, and peace.

Lots of Love

Trash the Tubes

Milan is so relieved to have the breathing tubes removed. Immediately, he whispered, "That feels better." Our Milan set a record--breathing tubes can stay in as long as two days and he got the okay for removal in two and a half hours. (He told me he would set that record before the surgery:)

Dr. Laks visited the family yesterday. Turns out this surgery was even more imperative than we originally thought. Dr. Laks informed us Milan's mitral valve was abnormal all together, his atrium was abnormally enlarged (we knew he had a big heart), and he had significant leakage from the valve as well. He described the procedure as a complicated repair, which explains the length of the surgery. We felt your prayers throughout the day, but still found ourselves anxious when things took longer than expected. Dr. Laks described the results as favorable considering the task at hand. He is satisfied with the efficiency of Milan's heart. Yay!

A Beating Heart

Praise God! Dr. Laks repaired Milan's own valve. He is off the heart and lung machine, and his heart is beatting! Such a relief to hear. Milan should arrive in intensive care in the next half hour.

Pray for his recovery, especially in the next few days. Specific Prayer Requests:
- Pray Milan's recovery can avoid post-operative complications
- Pray his blood stays clear of clots and embolisms
- Pray for peace and comfort while the breathing tubes are still in his throat
- Pray for wisdom on behalf of the nurses and staff.

Thank you for your prayers. God is good!

God's Sense of Humor

At about 12:45 we got a call from the operating room that Milan is on the heart and lung machine. Now Dr. Laks can navigate the intracies of his heart with his skilled hands. From what he can see so far, he feels he can repair Milan's valve.

I must say today's lesson is in patience and trust. In a waiting room filled with many eager families, the mix of emotions is palpable. Each time the phone rings, I wait to hear if they yell out a butchered version of the name "Yerkovich." After one phone call, I felt tears welling up in my eyes as the reality of this day hit me. My mom walked me outside and gave me a hug. The cool breeze and her soothing embrace soothed my nerves, breaking the day's clouds like strong beams of light.

Suddenly we heard a voice behind us. "Oh thats so sweet. Women can do that, but men can't. It's a real talent." The voiced continued as if talking on a cell phone, "You gotta see this Joe, it's so beautiful. Oh ya, I'll get those papers to you soon." We turned around, only to find a homeless man comentating our moment of comfort. He sat and talked to himself, his hand clutching not a phone, but a white grocery bag of belongings.

We giggled as he continued to talk on our behalf, "Women can do this. It's so nice," A second later, he walked over, looking at us with light blue eyes behind rough, tan skin. "That was really nice," he said. "She was sad, but you gave her a hug and now she's better."

"You're right," my mom responded. "Comfort is important."

"Oh ya. Most men don't get it, but I do. Women just get it," he muttered as he scuffled away.

We laughed at his comments, but also left endeared with his honesty. God shows even a man on the streets understands the importance of comfort and connection.

Now Underway

Due to surgery prep and some delays, they are now making their way to Milan's heart. Pray all goes smoothly as they transition his body to the heart and lung machine.

Absolutely, Positively, without a Doubt, NO FEAR! (Not even a little bit)

This morning a ratted, torn shirt hung loosely over Milan’s shoulders. Some thin holes along the back emerged from thousands of spin cycles in the washing machine. Other larger tears were battle scars from his Kung Fu mass attack. With five guys attacking you at once, this shirt survived the incessant ambush of kicks, elbows, and for the moment, harmful hands. Through defense and retaliation, Milan proved he deserved a black belt hanging from his waist. He lived the bold message on the back of this shirt: Absolutely, Positively, without a Doubt, NO FEAR! (Not even a little bit).

Today a different kind of mass attack is at hand--one that requires more precision and repair than blocks and throws. Both can be nerve racking, but both strengthen the heart. It’s funny how pain seems to be a prerequisite for growth and repair. Muscle fibers tear to build strength, fires replenish soil, trimming a garden bare solicits new blossoms; all marks of the curse.

Today, Milan faces a surgery that will bring revitalization and efficiency to his heart. Please pray for the procedure to go well, the doctors’ discernment, and peace for Kay. Milan will be in intensive care for 1 to 2 days after his surgery. He will need to relax with breathing tubes in his throat until doctors feel he is ready to breath on his own. Pray for peace in his heart and mind during this uncomfortable time.

Thank you so much for your support and prayers. We can feel them. I’ll update you soon.

Kelly